I haven’t picked up my well-worn copy in more than a decade, but the now-ubiquitous “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” was my constant companion for the months leading up to both my pregnancies.

Thinking back to that time, I’m not sure that even that mostly comprehensive guide could have prepared me for what lay ahead.

In which case, a condensed version might have sufficed…
.

What to Expect When You’re Expecting

many a question
indigestion

moods swinging
worries springing

room arranging
mind changing

tummy lurches
nanny searches

name choosing
noon snoozing

back aching
night waking

name trying
diaper buying

head reeling
heavy feeling

chubby clothing
hubby loathing

labor fearing
friends cheering

over-reading
overeating

spouse quibbling
late-night nibbling

weight gaining
Lamaze training

smell heightening
bra tightening

test enduring
daycare touring

swollen feets
stolen treats

due dating
anticipating

©2010 Carlotta Eike Stankiewicz