Scientists, I hear ya –
All those warnings ‘bout bacteria
Bringing microbes by the score
To food fallen on the floor.
Yes, I see that you have tested
How fast grub will get infested,
Dropping tidbits on the tile
to examine in a while.
It appears that your inspection
Has determined that collection
Of those spreaders of infection
Happens soon after connection.
Things like nasty salmonella
That could hurt a healthy fella,
And e. coli that’s just waiting
To begin contaminating.
So you say we shouldn’t risk it
For a brownie or a biscuit
(even if it’s really yummy)
That has landed somewhere scummy.
And your warnings are quite dire
Should one drop a pacifier
And then pop it in one’s mouth
To remove the spores that sprout.
But I thought that you should know
That – as far as kitchens go –
When it comes to floor hygiene,
Mine is relatively clean.
So I’ve cooked up a solution
For reducing the confusion,
A new policy that’s firm
For insuring us ‘gainst germs.
It’s as simple as can be–
No more five seconds, nor three.
And my new food safety tool?
I call it The Two-Second Rule.
©2012 Carlotta Eike Stankiewicz