O, thou gold and gleaming arches
That promise meat and salt and starches,
And ‘scapes on which our babes doth play,
We sing thy praises sweet today!

Where else might mothers bring their brood
For warm and cheap and ready food?
Where else find treat and toy combined
For but two dollars fifty-nine?

Ah, happy, happy, happy meal!
Our sanity ‘plauds thy appeal;
For naught can quiet whines and cries
Like burger, drink and ketchupped fries.

And such repast is quickly downed
By children wishing soon to bound
About on wondrous molded plastic,
Slides and towers and tubes fantastic.

O Friend of all maternal folk!
You give us peace and Diet Coke.
If we could bottle up thy essence
Why need there be antidepressants?

© 2009 Carlotta Stankiewicz